Living life is a series of lessons in growth. The one thing that is a constant in life is CHANGE. If we don't allow ourselves to learn and grow, we can find ourselves extremely lost because evolution in life happens whether we choose to evolve with it or not. That can leave us feeling very overwhelmed.
As women, another area we tend to overlook or move down on the list is our own personal development and growth. We "do, do, do" for everyone else and tend to leave nothing for ourselves. We leave ourselves no time for things that fill us up and that leaves us ... lacking. We lack energy, motivation, and in our own self-value and self-worth.
That can show up in several ways. Do you identify with any of these:
- Lack of motivation
- Lack of fulfillment and lack of passion
- Feeling your relationships are being neglected
- Neglecting your passions and the things that light you up
- Feeling "stuck" in life, like every day is Groundhog's Day
- Overly critical of yourself
- Low Self-Esteem
- The feeling of overwhelm with life's busyness
- Ignoring what your heart is telling you to do
- Suffer from comparison-itis with others
- Feel like you say YES to all the things except yourself, and you are burnt out
If you often feel 3 of these or more on a consistent basis, it may be time to re-focus some time to yourself and learn to say YES to YOU.
Here's the thing. As women, many times we have guilt when we pay attention to our own needs or when we invest money or time into ourselves, but it really is the best thing you can do for those in your life. Have you ever been on an airplane and heard the flight attendant say "Put your own oxygen mask on before assisting others."? What would happen if you needed that oxygen mask, but instead of getting yours on you began to put one on your kids, your husband, a stranger? You would run out of oxygen and not be able to help ANYONE. In fact, then YOU would become the one who needed someone else to help you! The same is true in day-to-day life. We are so busy caring for the ones we love that we easily neglect ourselves. Eventually, that can lead to burnout, depression, and even physical sickness.
So, what are some ways you can say YES to yourself?
- make time to spend with friends
- get a massage
- get a manicure or pedicure
- eat nutritious foods
- cooking
- stretching
- listening to audiobooks or podcasts
- travel
- learning an new skill
- getting better sleep
- taking a digital detox
- exercise
- meditation
- cleaning out your closet or a style overhaul
- scheduling date nights
- journaling
- read a book
- take up a hobby that brings you joy
- practice deep breathing when you feel overwhelmed
When you choose to say YES to yourself, it allows you to live from a place of :
- Empowerment - When you choose to take the wheel in your life, you have a beautiful sense of control. Over time, you begin to develop a flow of true knowingness. You begin to understand yourself and your body and know when something is right for you.
- Authenticity - You begin to tune in to what feels like a match for your energy. Everything you involve yourself in feels amazing because you are no longer saying YES to things that don't light you up.
- Confidence - As you take time to really get to know what you like, and what you dislike and learn who you are and what matters to you, you develop a self-assuredness. It becomes easy for you to say yes or no to things from a confident place because you can feel it inside your body.
- Happiness - When you take the time to focus on yourself, your joy, your passions, your relaxation, and your health, you just feel more joyful. Instead of a dark shadow of running around handling the day-to-day grind, you are infusing your life with things that are joyful and relaxing to you and life becomes brighter.
- Growth - As you expand your mind and heart, this also influences your confidence within. You speak about things differently. You are WILLING to speak about things and share your knowledge. This feeling makes you want to become even more expansive and learn more.
- Positive Mindset - When you take the time for yourself, the tough things feel a little less hard. You can see a light at the end of a tough tunnel. Your perspective and mindset change. You no longer take everything on by yourself and you can see how to shift a negative mindset into a positive mindset and you feel so much better.
- Resilience - Because you have joyful things to look forward to, you know you can bounce back from life's challenges in a more healthy way.
- Inspiration - You begin paying closer attention to the things happening around you. You will feel called to explore new things because you have a growth mindset and feel deep inside how it has impacted you and those around you.
- Better Relationships - When you feel happier, when you take care of yourself, it allows you to feel gratitude for the things and people around you. You can help others see a more positive side to life and you become a great role model for your kids, your spouse, and your friends. People feel your energy and want to be in that amazing glow!
- A Wholly Enriched Life - When you learn to say YES to yourself, this can mean saying NO to things that don't make you happy and don't bring you joy. That in and of itself shifts how you feel about your life. You are letting go of the things that drag you down. We get only one life, you deserve to embrace the joy in it!
There are many ideas in here for things to do to say YES to yourself. The most important key is to find the things that call to you, speak to you, and interest you. It will be different for each one of us.
The other important and KEY thing is to take baby steps. If you try and go in with a plan to do 10 new things or to spend too much time to start, that could lead to failure or giving up. Start small. Choose one or two things that will light you up, spend an hour or two a week doing them and gradually increase the time each week or bi-weekly. You will have to retrain your brain that replacing activities you don't love with things that you do love is an important and healthy choice and that IT IS OKAY. You deserve it!
Here's to finding yourself, saying yes to yourself, and living a life you love starting TODAY!
Stylishly Yours,
PS - I would love to hear from you! Did this post resonate with you? What are you going to make time for immediately that will allow you to say YES to yourself? Just hit comment on this post.
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