You step into your closet and take a deep breath. As you stare into the depths of all of the clothes that you own, you HAVE to figure out what to wear that is going to ensure you are taken seriously. It's a big deal kind of day and you must be on-point. You need to feel LIKE A BOSS today and you know that will start with style.
I know you have been there at some point. We all have. In fact, I believe that we find ourselves feeling this need quite often and many times we don't know where to start.
Confidence is tricky because the smallest thing can throw it off track. There is a relationship between how you feel on the inside and how you show up on the outside. Close your eyes and think back to a time you felt REALLY beautiful, like deeply felt it. Maybe it was a date night, maybe you were a guest at a wedding, maybe it was YOUR wedding day. You put on your outfit and not only did it put a little pep in your step, but when you looked in the mirror, you just knew that you looked like a million bucks!
How we feel on the inside is incredibly important to happiness and success. When you can do the internal work to learn how to truly love yourself for all of your gifts and see your flaws from a place of kindness, you have hit gold. But, working on these internal things takes time and is truly a lifelong habit you have to develop and continually work towards with every new challenge or life stage.
One of the things I love about style is that it can boost your mood and your confidence working from the Outside-In. It's a way to quickly give your confidence a charge! Style is deeply personal and when you nail it, you carry yourself differently, you talk differently. But, style doesn't just happen. It's an art and like anything, you have to work on it for it to stay sharp. If you don't, you will lose it. As a Personal Style Coach™️, this is something that I make easy for women. And today, I want to give you 5 Simple Tips to super charge your confidence when it really matters!
Tip #1: The Perfect Fit
If you are tugging at your clothes all day because they are too tight in places OR you are wearing clothes that are too big for your shape (or don't flatter it), with every tug or glance you see of yourself in the mirror, you will send a subconscious message to yourself that you are not comfortable and that will show in how you carry yourself.
You MUST have well-fitting clothes. Finding a good tailor is absolutely essential. A common mistake women make when shopping is thinking that they clothes they buy at a store, boutique, or online should fit them perfectly off the hanger. This is false. You will hear me say it again and again, the way I wear a size 8 will not fit someone else who is a size 8 in the same way. You must fit the largest part of your body and then tailor for your body. For example, in a jacket, the shoulders must fit because that is a very expensive alteration. Shaping can be done to make it fit elsewhere.
If you are not willing to tailor an item for the perfect fit, you should not buy it.
Along with this, do not keep clothing in your closet that no longer fits as your body has changed. Every time you see these pieces, they make you feel bad because you no longer fit in them. They are taking up mental space that they do not deserve. Our bodies change as we get older and we cannot choose where weight goes on our bodies. Even women who exercise and are completely fit struggle with changing bodies. Don't let them take valuable real estate in your closet or your mind!
Tip #2: A Little Sexy Something
You know the feeling when you know a secret that no one else knows and it just gives you that little extra sass about you? Well, you can add a little secret sexiness underneath even the most business formal outfit.
When we feel sexy or beautiful, we walk taller. Let's amp up your confidence by putting on a sexy little lacy something under your power suit (or whatever you are wearing). On top of the fact that you get a boost from wearing it, you get the added benefit of the "secret" of it. Knowing that you are giving a presentation or activity you need a boost for wearing a flirty something underneath is exhilarating. It's like you are doing something you aren't supposed to be and yet nobody knows it. It gives you that "I know something you don't know" energy that will make you feel like a powerhouse.
Tip #3: Know Your Power Color
When you have something important going on, you need to look to your power color! What is a power color? It's a color you wear that makes you feel like a badass. It's a color that when you wear it, you automatically feel a lift. For many people, their power color is Red (I know it is mine), but you need to think about how you feel when you wear specific colors. If you have never thought about this before, start now! Is there a color that you feel makes you look super sexy or glowy? Maybe it's a color that makes your eyes pop. The idea is that whatever the color, it gives you an adrenaline shot when you put it on.
Once you figure out your power color, now you need to use it! Anytime you need a lift to your spirits or in your confidence, pull out that color from your closet and wear it so that you bring that "I own this room" energy!
Tip #4: Channel Someone Else
When you need to step into your personal power, you can look to someone whose style inspires you! If you aren't sure who this may be, start looking around. Maybe it's a character on television or in a movie. You may be inspired by an acquaintance you know through your child's school. Maybe one of your best friends has a style that you admire. Get inspired!
Obviously I am not talking about #FatalAttraction vibes here 😆, but sometimes when we need to get pumped up, it can be helpful to play a role. If you are meeting a potential new client for a coffee, is there an actress or character that you can channel?
**I need to make a note with this one: You don't want to channel someone else all the time, just if you are struggling to pull your confidence together. I used to act in school plays and I always felt so powerful "being someone else". When I had to speak in front of the entire school as a Cheerleader, it was always more difficult for me because I was just ME. I want you to work on feeling confident being you, as you are, but for a short time, if you need to borrow someone else's attitude, it can help.
Tip #5: Affirm Yourself
Take a moment on your own to look at yourself in the mirror and say some positive affirmations about yourself. This may feel strange if it's not something that you are used to doing, but it is extremely powerful. This is what you do:
- Stand in front of the mirror in a room all by yourself.
- Look into your own eyes.
- Say one to five affirming statements with conviction.
- Repeat the statements five times.
When you do this, you are building trust with yourself. You are speaking your best intentions and your confidence into reality. By looking into your own eyes when you do it, you are talking deeply into your soul.
I'm listing some options for affirming statements that you can say. Feel free to come up with your own, but if you need a head start, here are some good ones:
- Today is my day to shine.
- I am worthy and capable of achieving anything I set my mind to.
- I am confident and strong.
- What I have to say has impact on others and my knowledge is valuable.
- I look beautiful and I'm ready to take on this day in my power.
- I look powerful and I'm ready to be seen and heard.
- I am strong, confident, and beautiful.
- There is no one else like me in this world and I matter.
- I am a BADASS.
- I am ready for whatever this day brings.
These 5 confidence boosters can make all the difference and most of them are easy things you can do on any given morning to ensure that you are feeling your best and most confident self. I always say that clothing is the armor we wear every day and I truly believe that it is. While you are working on building your inner confidence and belief in yourself, use these tips to live it from the outside-in. You will start to see a difference in yourself!
Stylishly Yours,
PS - Are you ready for a style makeover? I would love to walk alongside you through your transformation! My Level UP package will do it ALL
My Level UP package will do it ALL. You will have 3 months with me at your side to develop a unique style for YOU and to answer any questions you may have as you begin living your life with your new next-level woman. Let the transformation begin!
Let the transformation begin!
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